operation cell phone

"Hi, I'll take the tire on the second row from the top?"

Here's my overdue update on what happened with my phone for those who have been waiting breathlessly for news. It turns out that my phone was stolen from the bar by a 24 year-old former employee. After depositing my $100, he mailed it to me as promised by overnight delivery which arrived promptly 3 days later. After it was returned, my cousin and friends went to the bar two nights in a row looking to break out some badass kung fu, only to have the owner apologize profusely for what happened and to be told that said culprit didn't work there anymore. After that, there wasn't really anything more that the owner could do. Beyond promising that he "wouldn't be welcome there anymore", their hands were kind of tied. I like to imagine the guy breezily walking in on a Friday night and having the bouncers put him into a headlock at the door and then toss him into the dirty alleyway, smearing his face in used condoms and cigarette butts as he wallows in self-pity and shame. But more likely, his only penalty was having to pay the full cover to get in.